(Presidents City)

I detest that scrawny little runt. I hate the way she lets it sleep in the bed and lick inside her mouth. I hate the way she holds it like a baby and talks to it in that stupid voice while it dumps a load in her sports bra. It drives me insane. It's more of a rodent than a dog. It deliberately fucks with my head on a daily basis. Every time we're having sex, it sits there tinkling on me. It pissed on my new Eris sneakers last week. Three's a crowd and I refuse to play second fiddle to a terrier. I'm offering somebody $200 to take that bitch out. I don't care how you do it. Just make sure it disappears for good.



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