Pupil: Dino Perdente
Class of: 1997
High School: Alderney City Tech

What's up losers???!!!! It's the Hoseman here! MVP 1997!!! You know it - yeah you do!! Working part-time at a gas station and full-time at chasing ass!!! Some things never change! I still live with my Mom in Alderney City and go out drinking with Fishface, Spunky and Bubble every night! SWEET! High school ring as well. I'd like to hear from any of the hot chicks I used to hook up with. Suzie, Marianne, Yolanda, Chu Hua... FIRE, FIRE!! Quick, where's the hose? Right here, baby, right here. Check me out. Fuckin A!

For the record, Dino, you were the worst lay of my life. More like a straw than a hose.
- Yolanda.