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| These days, police officers carry around expensive equipment to tell you how smashed you are. Getting pulled over is a good way to tell that you're drunk, but since you can't always count on that happening, here are 10 tell-tale signs that the Piswasser has started to work its magic: |
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| 1 | | It dawns on you that you are rich beyond your wildest dreams |
| 2 | | The locks to your house appear to have been changed |
| 3 | | Someone is pulling your pants up in the ladies room |
| 4 | | You drop your Chihuahua hotdog on the floor, pick it up and carry on eating |
| 5 | | The cocktail waitress who you're flirting with went to school with your mother |
| 6 | | You wake up in Rio de Janeiro with a biker named Rex |
| 7 | | You're French-kissing a basset hound |
| 8 | | You suddenly realize you've been masturbating to that knife show on TV for three hours |
| 9 | | You're in bed with your uncle and realize that school starts in two hours |
| 10 | | Last night was Friday, but today's newspaper says that it's Monday |
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